12 Signs You’re Ready to Quit Facebook (from Miguel)
June 28, 2010
Hi all,
one of the purpose of World Youth day is to “make the person of Jesus the center of the faith and life of every young person” (John Paul II). With this in mind, a friend of mine sent me the following article (see below) that touches on a very relevant topic for us, today’s youth. The name of the article is “12 signs it is time to quit Facebook”. As you read it, you will see how this article tries to encourage people not to make their lives depend on virtual relationships, that is, relationships that are Not based on personal face-to-face interactions with others. Our Archbishop has also recently touched on this same issue in his weekly blog: http://archbishopsmith.blogspot.com/2010/06/real-presence.html.
Enjoy and I hope this helps each one of you find our Lord and establish a real relationship with Him.
12 Signs it is Time to Quit Facebook
Last month, Quit Facebook Day was celebrated — a day that saw over 34,500 Facebook users quitting the social networking site amidst concerns over privacy. Not exactly the biggest dent in the website’s 450 million members, but a valiant effort from its founders nonetheless. However, there are also those users who need to quit for many more reasons than privacy. Those that can’t go an hour without updating their status or commenting on a photo — more commonly known as Facebook addicts. We’ve listed 12 of the most common signs of Facebook addiction over the following pages. If you tick on one or two of these, you’re probably just as addicted to Facebook as the next person. If you find you’re nodding along to most of the list, perhaps it’s time to take a step away from the monitor.
1. You’ve ever written ‘First!’
We’re not sure where the idea came from that you get special kudos for commenting on something first, but just for the record — you don’t. In fact, doing it repeatedly is more likely to get you booted off your friends’ lists quicker than you can say, well, “first.”
2. You’ve created a separate account for your baby/cat/favourite plant
Let’s break this down — if you create an account for someone, or something, that can’t actually use it, you’re going to be the one updating it.
It’ll start innocently enough. A couple of status updates here and there “in character.” Maybe a few wall posts. But then before you know it, you’ll be having full blown conversations with yourself between your real and fake profiles. That’s the first sign of madness these days, don’t you know?
3. You haven’t seen your husband/wife/significant other recently
See that person you’re listed as in a relationship with on Facebook? Well they also exist away from the computer too, remember? Facebook was recently found to be a factor in one in five divorces, and we’re sure the figures are even higher for relationship break-ups. If you’ve not seen your other half in a while, you might want to make sure they aren’t filing the divorce papers and packing their bags while you’re busy updating your status.
4. You take pictures of yourself. Are you guilty of posing in front of your webcam? Or have ever taken a photo of yourself in the mirror just to use as your profile picture? This is a sign of S.V.B. — seriously vain behaviour, a condition contracted from extended use of Facebook. We’d say the best course of treatment is to go out with your mates, take your camera and enjoy flicking through the photos afterwards. We’d wager there’ll be plenty of cracking snaps to use as your profile picture, and no doubt great memories captured at the same time.
5. You check Facebook on vacation. The sun is shining, you’re on an exotic beach somewhere and you’ve forked out your hard-earned cash to get away from it all. Why then, pray tell, would you be checking Facebook? This is addiction at its most devastating — not only will you miss out on chunks of your holiday with your face in your phone or computer, but when the roaming charges land on your next bill, you’ll need to take out a loan to pay them off.
6. You speak to your best friend more often on Facebook than in real life.
Previously you’d pick up your phone if you wanted to tell your friends something, or maybe drop them a text message to meet for a chat. If you’ve found you’re now talking to them more on Facebook than in real life, do your friendship a favour, close down the chat box and grab a coffee together.
7. You’d forget your friends’ birthdays if it wasn’t for Facebook reminders
Remember before the days of Facebook, when you wrote birthdays, important dates and events in a calendar or diary? If Facebook now runs your social life, telling you when to say “happy birthday” and when you’re going where, you could run into a pickle when you can’t access it for some reason. We’re not sure how popular you’ll be when you forget your mom’s birthday because Facebook goes down for maintenance.
8. Your mood depends on how many ‘friends’ you’ve added to your account. Let’s get one thing straight — the number of Facebook friends you have is not directly proportionate to your popularity in the real world. In fact there’s plenty of evidence to suggest it may well be the opposite. If you’re finding yourself getting upset that you haven’t had a friend request in a few hours, or that your next door neighbor has more Facebook friends than you, it’s probably time to move away from the keyboard and get some face-to-face time with your real-life friends.
9. You’ve taken out a loan to cover your Farmville/Fish World/Mafia habit.
If you’ve been hooked in to playing one of these Facebook games, not only will you have no doubt flooded your friends’ feeds with news that you just bought a new fish/sheep/gun, but you’ve probably spent a fair bit of dough on it in the process. If your bank balance is starting to see the effects of your addiction, you might want to think about reining it in a bit, and spending your cash on something away from your computer, in the real world.
10. You’ve ever updated your status while sitting on the loo
There are some things that can just wait, and one of those is status updating. If you’ve ever found yourself coming up with something you just have to share with the world while sitting on the loo, put the phone down and wait until you’re back at your computer. Of course, if you’ve taken your computer with you, well then that’s a whole different level of addiction you need to address…
11. You’ve started over sharing. Hey, depressed guy! Facebook isn’t your agony aunt, okay? You shouldn’t be broadcasting how horrible your break-up was or how much you still love your ex on your profile. Nobody really wants to read it. And we’d bet that includes your ex, too. Of course there is the other end of the scale — are you one of those couples who feel the need to express their love for each other at every possible opportunity? It might have been cute the first five times you did it, now it’s just annoying.
12. When you’re out, you’re wondering what’s happening on Facebook
It should go without saying — when you’re with your friends, your mind should not be on Facebook. So if you’re finding yourself getting a nervous tic when you’ve been away from Facebook for more than a few hours, it’s definitely time for a break. You can rest in the knowledge that all the news, comments and photos will be there when you get home, and you’ll have plenty of material from the time with your mates to update your status with.
11th Sunday in Ordinary Time: Broken
June 28, 2010
Last Tuesday evening I was here for XLT. It’s an hour or an hour and a half of prayer, music, and adoration of the Blessed Sacrament. It’s organized by Mike Landry, our Youth Minister. One of our young parishioners spoke about the year of missionary work she had just completed in Eastern Canada with NET ministries. She spoke about some of the successes and challenges that she experienced. And she also spoke about her personal growth during that year. She discovered that she had built walls inside herself (those are her words), to insulate herself from some of the negative things that had happened in her life.
Sitting in front of me was a young couple with a little baby – couldn’t have been more than about six weeks old – beautiful blue eyes and a wonderful, toothless smile. And I thought about the things that happen in our lives that change us from the wide-eyed innocence we’re born with to the people we are today.
We begin like this perfect vase [shows vase], and we’re protected – at least to a certain extent [puts vase in protective envelope]. And then,
…we don’t get that birthday present that we really wanted [smashes vase with hammer, breaking the vase],
…or we’re bullied at school [smashes vase again],
…or we fail a very important test that would have helped us get into university [smash],
…or we drink too much one night and make a very serious mistake [smash],
…or our husband leaves us for another woman [smash],
…or someone we love very much dies [smash].
What’s happened to that perfect vase? It’s broken! So we try to fix it ourselves [tries to fit broken pieces of the vase together].
“My parents are just losers. They don’t know how to buy good presents for kids.”
“That test was not fair. I didn’t know they were going to ask questions like that. It’s not my fault that I failed.”
“Just wait ‘till my ex-husband starts living with that new woman. He’ll find out just how good he had it with me.”
We try to repair our own brokenness, but what do we have? Is our vase perfect again?
In today’s Gospel, we meet some broken people – some who know they’re broken, and some who don’t. Jesus was eating at the home of one of the Pharisees. The Pharisees were the religious leaders of the time, and they were obsessed about showing the people that they followed the Law – including the many dietary laws and the laws related to ritual purity. And they looked down their noses at anyone who didn’t follow the Law the way they did.
So in comes this woman with a jar of expensive ointment. She is not just a sinner – but she is a public sinner – everyone in town knew she was a sinner. And she knew she was a sinner. She didn’t come to Jesus and say: “I had no choice – I had to do those things – It’s not my fault.” She wasn’t trying to repair her own vase. She sat at the feet of Jesus, weeping, washing his feet with her tears, and drying them with her hair. She understood her brokenness, and turned to Jesus, who clearly saw her sins, and yet offered forgiveness: “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”
And the Pharisees complained! “This man is supposed to be a prophet. Doesn’t he know that by just touching this woman, he is becoming unclean?” What an amazing contrast! The woman who clearly understands who she is in her broken human nature, and the Pharisees who had built up these walls of “The Law,” to give themselves and others the illusion of wholeness.
Now when I talk about brokenness and remind you that each of us is broken to some extent, I worry that some of you might leave church today hanging your heads and being depressed – thinking about all the difficulties you’ve faced in your lives. But brokenness is part of the human condition. It’s something we all share. We can look at disappointments, and challenges, and tragedies that have happened in our lives like the changes we see in our faces as we age. Some refer to them as “wrinkles” while others call them “character lines.” I think it’s a wonderful distinction.
So how do we deal with our brokenness – our wrinkles – our character lines? I can’t see any of us jumping for joy when bad things happen to us – when we make bad decisions, but we can have hope – and our hope is Jesus – Jesus, who accepted the tears of the woman who was a public sinner – Jesus, who didn’t come for those whose vase is perfect and unmarked, but who came for people like you and me – chipped and cracked.
In the second reading today, St. Paul told us how he dealt with his brokenness. Although Paul was one of our greatest saints, his vase was badly broken. He spoke often in his letters of his past, when he persecuted the Church of Christ. In the reading today, he admitted that when he was a Pharisee, he was a hypocrite. And later, after his conversion he was beaten, imprisoned, shipwrecked and ridiculed. And he didn’t say what we sometimes say when we try to protect or repair ourselves: “Those people are just stupid. It’s not my fault. They’ll eventually know I was right all along.” No, none of that. He said: “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me.” “…no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me.” “I no longer have to say or do things to make me feel better about myself when the world throws me a curve – it is Christ who lives in me. It is Christ who makes me whole.”
Last week, on the Feast of the Body and Blood of Christ, Father Paul spoke to the children receiving their First Communion. He reminded them of the importance of coming to Mass regularly and receiving the Body and Blood of Christ. We know that even though we only receive the consecrated host, we still receive the Body and Blood of Christ. And as we eat this heavenly food and as we are fed by the Word of God, we can become more like St. Paul – no longer living for ourselves, but living for – and in – Christ. We can become whole through our relationship with Jesus.
I’m going to leave the broken vase here for you to see. And I would ask that, at the Offertory, when you put your money in the collection basket, you also offer your brokenness to Jesus. You can have confidence that he will accept your brokenness and give you love in return. And when you come up for Communion, look again at the broken vase and know Jesus comes to you in your brokenness. Have faith, go in peace – it is Christ who lives in you.